(no subject)

Sick to death of my dependence, fighting food to find transcendence
Fighting to survive, more dead but more alive
Cigarettes and speed for livin', and sleeping pills to feel forgiven

let the good times roll

woah! what do you know, another shitty day.

sometimes i sear to hell that i'm charlie fucking brown.

least it was a short swim from my appartment to the t.

man fuck it.
  • Current Music
    mose allison

(no subject)

blah...

i don't even really know why i go home anymore.

i always think it will make me feel better, but most of the time i just feel worse. sure it's great spending time with my parents. and there isn't anything better than talking to my dad on the way back. but i get here, and i realize there isn't anything for me in this town anymore. guess there really isn't anything for me anywhere anymore.

fuck it.

(no subject)

when you're back in your old neighborhood the cigarettes taste so good, but you're so misunderstood.
  • Current Music
    robert johnson - hellhound on my trail

(no subject)

I know you're alone
In the dark, all alone
Underneath the covers
Hiding from the demons
That came for your soul.

They might be over in the closet
They might be underneath your bed
They might be just outside your window, baby
Or maybe just inside your head.

But if you let me stay over
I'll try to keep you safe
I've got an army of skeletons
To chase your demons away.

I know that you're scared
You're in the dark, so scared
Simply terrified, no one'll hear you screaming
If they could would they care?

There's only one way to find out
I pray that day never comes
For that would mean the ending of you, baby
The end of you, my love.

But if you let me stay over
I'll try to keep you safe
I've got an army of skeletons
To chase your demons away.

And baby, I can tell you've been crying
Oh baby, I know you've been lying to me
Yes indeed.
Oh baby, I can tell you don't sleep no more
Oh baby, believe me I've been there before.

If you let me stay over
I'll try to keep you safe
I've got an army of skeletons
To chase your demons away.
  • Current Mood
    don't worry about it

(no subject)

i don't what im going to do.

i don't know how to get better, because i don't even know whats wrong with me.

all i know is that it's never been this bad before, and has gone on for this long.

i used to be able to control it...feel it comming on and kill it before it took hold. but now i feel as if it's too late.

before i felt like as bad as things got, i still had hope that it would someday be better. but now, i posses no such hope. because i know it's not going to change...do i even want it to? doesn't my own pain help others?

no, that's just self-absorbed bullshit.

it's all so tiring, and it is getting debilitating. im run down and burnt out.

it may be time to say good bye.